Wednesday, November 21, 2007

i dont understand

im tied up up between two people i love. On the one hand, my mom tells me she knows better cuz she knows how men act. She's seen it for 25 years with my father. She tells me look at him drink. look at him serve that women and drink with her and his friends. how can she act like she is family she is nothing. How can he disrespect you and me at this place? How can you permit that. And there is doubt. What is her agenda what does she get out of being sneaky? If she is gone someone else will come and replace her. He will replace her with someone else. and on the other hand I trust him. He wouldnt do that to me. Of course she is a slut. Of course she is no good but I trust him completly. What does he want from her? This woman who would otherwise offer nothing. I am complicit.

I put up with that shit. What you decide to do I must let you know that since you are breaking her off. I will put my limit as well. If she comes up again, I will leave. It seems fair.

I want to be alone for a while. I dont want to cry for no one.


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